Best Jokes of All Time

1Good women are found on every corner of the earth but sadly the earth is round!


2Come to the Darkside... We have cookies!


3How does Michael Jackson pick his nose? From a catalogue.


4Come to the dark side, we have Loki, and cookies


5Why does Michael Jackson like twenty eight year olds? Because there's 20 of them.


6Mom, I'm on Coke.. [OMG how dare you?] ...and Pepsi!


7Come to the nerd side... We have pi


8I know Victoria's secret and it ain't pretty.


9I know why the lights went out. Because they liked each other.


10Yo mama so fat, she takes up space


11What is black and white and red? A sunburned zebra.


12What do you call a 70s cookie band? OREO Speedwagon.


13Do you have a PSP? [Yes] Haha, you have a Pretty Small Penis


14What happens to a Rhinoceros during puberty? He gets horny.


15What does a television have in common with a rabbit? His ears!


16What did the crop say to the farmer? Why are you always picking on me?


17What doesn't get wet when it rains? The ocean.


18How many teenage girls does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 11. One to screw it in and 10 to take 200 photos of it for Facebook.


19Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! To get away from the cook! To prove he's no chicken!


20Why does Mr. McMahon have to go to heaven? Because he has no chance in hell.


21What's the difference between a mole and an eagle. They both live underground, except for the eagle.


22Your mama is so fat she couldn't fit on Earth


23Yo mama so stupid when she got fired she set herself on fire.


24Defeating a sandwich only makes it tastier


25What's green and dangerous? A frog with a gun


26A guy shows up late for work. The boss yells, "You should have been here at 8:30!" The guy replies, "Why? What happened at 8:30?"


27What has four wheels and flies? A garbage truck!


28How do spirits keep fit? They exorcise.


29What did the digital clock say to its mom? Look Mom, no hands.


30What do you call a three-humped camel? Pregnant.


31The only thing school is teaching me is texting without looking


32Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.


33Why did the chicken cross the road? You didn't cook it.


34How do you stop a rhino from charging? You take away his credit card!


35What did the football coach say to the broken vending machine? Give me my quarterback!